1) I'm 20 years old. I have spina bifida and I can walk perfectly normal but I have incontinence with my bladder. I get a lot of urinary tract infections, too. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. I am kind of worried about having sex with him because I always pee myself. I was wondering what I should do to stop getting these infections so I get be comfortable during sex and not have to think that I will pee on the bed.

2) I have been friends with a guy who has spina bifida for a while now, and recently, things took a turn for the better — we are just starting a relationship. I know that he has sensation below his waist, and can get an erection, but I wondered if there is anything about how his disability will affect our sex life. I am anxious for it to be pleasing for both of us, and although we are open enough for me to ask him questions, I would like to go in prepared so to speak! Is there anything that will be able to help me in making sure that the first time for us won't be awkward, uncomfortable or downright crap?!

1) I know this may seem like a strange question, but what exactly IS pre-orgasmic? Does it mean that a person hasn't yet had an orgasm, or that her body isn't ready yet? I remember reading in one of your answers that many women under the age of twenty are pre-orgasmic. Why is this? Also, what is/are the purpose(s) (besides pleasure) of orgasm in women?

2) Hi, I'm not from the USA, so you may call me "the foreigner boy." I'm a 20-year-old male... I have had a lovely, nice, 19-year-old girlfriend for the past two years and I love her very much! We've started making love after six months of being together. We’ve had oral sex since the very beginning of the relationship. My girlfriend was a virgin before we met and me too. The problem is this: She never reaches orgasm! We really did try it all... it's very disturbing because she doesn't understand why I think it’s a BIG DEAL! And I really want her to have orgasms, but she just can't reach it... We really did try it ALL!

She tried to masturbate alone a few times and still had the same feeling... It’s not that she doesn't have fun, but she never really reaches the Peak! It seems as if she is stopping herself from having orgasm. Any secret I haven't read or heard about could be helpful! Thank you for your time!

Sometimes I masturbate before I go to sleep at night. Usually nothing is wrong, but sometimes (and this always occurs at night, I've found) after I masturbate, a few minutes later I have to urinate. And when I do, it is usually very painful. The feeling doesn't pass either. My scrotum usually gets very tightened up, and there is painful feeling above my crotch. Usually I just sit there, drink some water until the feeling goes away. ANY idea what this is?

1) I've always used condoms combined with a sponge for birth control. That worked well because if anything happened with the condom, there was always a backup — it made me feel safer. Then I get to New York, I go into three drug stores, and none of them have sponges. Now what? I don't want to rely on just condoms, I don't want to take pills because the whole hormone thing is rather frightening, and a doctor said that diaphragms make you more prone to get urinary tract infections, which I get frequently. So what am I supposed to do? What's up with this total absence of sponges?

2) In exploring other forms of contraception, what is the reliability rate of the "sponge"?