How can I overcome my fears?

How do you deal with your fears? I have a fear of other people dying or of myself and others getting a disease. My imagination runs wild with these thoughts, and it's hard to control these worries. I'm always thinking "what if." My friends tell me not to worry unless it actually happens. I know this is true and good advice, but I find it hard to stop worrying. If you could give me some tips on how to control my imagination, it would be much appreciated.


What can I do to prevent vaginal dryness during sex?

My problem is about vaginal dryness. I am an otherwise healthy twenty-one-year-old female, but cannot seem to get wet enough for pleasurable sex with my husband. We both get sore afterwards and I feel like I am not "performing" much like I would imagine a man would feel if he couldn't get an erection. Here's the thing, my husband doesn't want me to use artificial lubricants. Honestly I don't either. Are there any alternatives to K-Y? Is dehydration or draining enough fluids a factor? Any info would be of much help. Thanks so much.


Should I tell my current partner if my ex just told me they have an STI?

I've been going out with a girl here at my school for the past six months. Last weekend I went home (out of state), and fooled around with an ex-girlfriend. She called me last night and told me that she might have an STI. She went to the doctor this week and told me she would let me know when she finds out for sure. We didn't use a condom.

My problem is, what should I tell my girlfriend? I really love her and don't want to ruin things because of this stupid fling I had. But I can tell she's annoyed that I've avoided her all weekend. I can't exactly tell her next time we get together that I don't feel like fooling around, but I don't know how long it will be before I know if I'm infected. And what do I do if I am? Help!


Is there a connection between emotions and physical pain?

When I hear someone make a negative comment about me it sometimes sticks and for some reason my chest will begin to hurt. A friend of mine said it was emotional shock. For a while the feeling went away, but then it got worse. Now the pain will range from my heart to my left arm, depending on how badly (depressed) I feel. In general, I want to know if I should be concerned or if it's just as my friend says: "emotional shock," that's just gotten worse.


What can I do if my parents don't believe I'm bi?

I came out recently to my parents as being bisexual. They were surprised, as expected, but they didn't believe me! They said it's "not normal for someone to suddenly change their orientation." But it wasn't sudden — I've known for a while! What should I tell them?


How should I tell my partner about my herpes?

When my boyfriend and I began our sexual relationship, he insisted on using condoms. I gratefully agreed because I felt it then wouldn't be necessary for me to tell him about my STD — herpes. Now, two months later he's decided that he "trusts" me enough to stop using the condoms. I don't see any way I can keep the relationship, even if he can handle the STD part, if I tell him I've been lying over the past two months. Do you have any advice? I don't want to lose him, but I don't want to be responsible for giving him any diseases either.


Am I ready to start dating a new guy?

I have recently started seeing this man who I think is adorable and things are going really well. My last relationship was a three year nightmare that ended a long time before I finally broke it off. Everyone keeps saying to follow the rules and take it slow and to be careful because I am on the rebound and it is too soon to get involved. How can I know if what I am feeling is right and if I should just go with the flow? I am still feeling so new at all this stuff and I am often very scared to get hurt again. Please give me some of your expert advice!


How can I help loved ones who have bulimia?

1) I've recently just found out that my boyfriend of four years is bulimic... He hasn't told me, but I have put the puzzle pieces together after living with him for the past 18 months... I had even heard him purging in the bathroom while we were on vacation. I'm really struggling with this information and I don't know how to approach him about it... I'm guessing it has been going on for around six years now. How do I confront him about it??

2) I was wondering if bulimics lose weight rapidly, because I have a friend who I think may be bulimic, because she eats, but I think she may be throwing up her food. She has lost 25 pounds in the last month. She binges, and I would like to know how I can help her.


What should I do if I'm successful but not happy?

I'm not in college anymore, but students could benefit from this question, too. I'm single with a 'great' job (pays well, insurance, pension, etc.), a decent place to live, no debt... in short, life could be much worse. But the only thing lately that makes me happy is doing kind things anonymously for people. I'm rather wealthy but don't want a big TV or a fancy car. I'd rather spend a vacation at a local monastery meditating and performing service. I'd be committing economic suicide to quit my job, and so many are worse off, but 'success through hard work' doesn't make me happy. I'm sure a number of students must have these feelings already. What are your feelings about this, Alice?


How can I stop being so emotionally sensitive?

As a 21 year old, I recognize that I'm far from being completely emotionally developed. But, I also recognize that I'm way behind others my age. I think I am too emotionally sensitive. Things people say or do really affect me. Whether I care about the person or not, I always have extreme emotional episodes after others express their feelings or opinions about me. If what they express is derogatory, I get very upset. If it's positive, I get very happy. And, I absolutely cannot deal with rejection. I want to be able to just ignore what others think and just deal with what I think. How can I achieve that goal?