Do male-identified people have body image concerns?

1) My boyfriend, who I have been dating for a while now, says that he is fat and I don't think he is. He is built, but he isn't fat. And he talks about it all the time, and I just don't know what to say to him. He said that when he used to talk with his other girlfriend about it, that she would say, "well, go on a diet," and he said that made him feel like he was fat. And I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I know that by losing weight, he would feel better about himself. But I like him for who he is and how he looks. But what should I say to him when he says things like he is fat, do you think I'm fat, etc.?

2) I am a male, 24 years old, height 5'10", and currently I weigh 143 lbs... When I was 17 or so, I weighed a hefty 190 lbs... at that time, that really had a negative effect on my self image, and now at 143, I still don't think I'm thin enough... I have lost all my weight 100 percent through diet and running about 20 miles/week... but I don't eat enough and I always worry before I leave home if I "look ok"? Do I have serious issues?!?


Why am I lacking sensation during sex with a partner?

I could not find anything on this on the web. Maybe you can help me. I have a woman in my life who I am considering marrying. The only thing really holding me back is the sex with her. The thing is that there is almost no sensation. Sex with her feels like I'm wearing a condom even though I am not. I am thinking that either she is "large" or "stretched out", or I am too small. Perhaps it's a combination of both. I've been with women who were so snug and tight that I was able to climax within seconds. With this woman, it is very difficult and takes more than 10 minutes. We've tried baby oil, "motion lotion", and KY heating gel.

Nothing works, and I'm fixing to find another woman just to satisfy me, which I don't really want to do. But I know that if I stay with her and nothing changes, I will cheat eventually anyway.

She has never had any children and hasn't really had all that many partners. I'm just thinking that she and I are not a good match in that department.

Can you please advise? Is there anything that she and/or I can do to make for a better "fit" and thus-a better sex life-and ultimately, lifelong monogamy?


Can I determine whether my girlfriend is a virgin?

I had my first sexual experience with my girlfriend a few months ago. She told me she was a virgin, but after having intercourse, I didn't believe her and was hurt. She didn't seem to be in any pain, there was no bleeding, and there was no hymen. She makes up all these excuses like "not all girls have them." Should I believe her? Is there a sure-fire way of determining whether or not I was her first? It is making me angry. Can you ease my pain?


Does my friend think she was raped?

You have an excellent service and give great advice. That is why I feel comfortable asking you this question. About three weeks ago, a group of my friends and I went out to a movie and then a club where we each had some alcohol. After the club, we went back to a friend's room where the group gradually dispersed until there was only myself, two male friends, and one female friend. We began to play sex games. Eventually, we all were naked, on my friend's bed. The female of the group was the center of our activity. She seemed to want it and even encouraged what the three of us started doing to her.

Although we all were tipsy, it was a great sexual experience for all of us, or so I thought. My two male friends have no problem with what happened. The only thing is that my female friend won't speak to us or return any of our calls. I saw her walking down the street the other day and tried to talk to her, but she wouldn't even raise her head to look me in the eye. Do you have any idea what is wrong? Could my friend feel that she was raped? I want to apologize, but I'm not sure what to do.


How can I make friends as a first-year student?

I'm having a tough time as a first year student. My classes aren't too difficult, I'm not very homesick, and I don't miss my parents too much. That's all okay. The problem is that I'm lonely. I have reached out to people in classes, in dining halls, everywhere! All I get in return is a brush-off. I give my phone number to people and they don't care enough to reciprocate. I sit with people during meals and never see them again. It's three weeks into the semester — have people made their friends already? I know there are people out there who are potential friends, but where are they? Are they also locking themselves up in their rooms and hiding in the library between classes and at night? I'm a nice, honest, and sincere person. I had a few very close friendships in high school and I'm not the outgoing party animal who needs a wide circle of friends to feel secure. I just need one or two close friends. People who are loyal and who need a friend as much as I need one. I just can't seem to find anyone who is as interested in me as I am in them. I'm a naturally shy and quiet person but my old friends tell me that once people get to know me, they'll really like me. I don't like parties, and I'd rather have one or two close friends than 15 acquaintances. What can I do?


Why do I feel guilty after orgasming?

Every time I have an orgasm (alone or with a partner) I have intense feelings of guilt. I was not brought up in a religious household and was never told to "wait until marriage". I've been in long term relationships with all my sexual partners so it's not like I feel guilty for sleeping around. It's getting to the point where I'm not enjoying sex anymore because I dread the feelings I have after an orgasm. Is this normal?