How can I help my friend whose mom has cancer?

The mother of one of my best friends from high school was diagnosed with liver cancer a few months ago. She is quite ill and in a lot of pain. She's been in and out of the hospital lately and things don't look so good. My own father was diagnosed with prostate cancer a year and a half ago, but he is really doing quite well (with medication, treatment, etc.). My friend's mother will probably be dead within six months to a year, so I'm not going through an immediate crisis.

My question is: What things should (and shouldn't) I be saying to, and doing for, my friend? I try so hard to be there for her but I really don't know what she's going through. She is very matter-of-fact about the fact that her mom is going to die. But I'm sure there's something I could be doing, isn't there? I hate feeling like I'm actually making her feel worse! Could you give me some idea of what she might be going through right now and how I could help? Even if it's a method for taking her mind off it occasionally (if that's a good idea).


Should I start PrEP?

If my husband takes antivirals or post-exposure prophylaxis can we still have sex with a condom and still complete the process like normal? It is affecting our sex life because he does not want to infect me. I don't want to be infected but I knew what I was getting into from the start. I might start PrEP as it is now available to me. What are your thoughts?


How can I work through the grief of a child's death?

My oldest daughter died in a motor vehicle accident seven months ago. I have a husband and three other daughters. I am very depressed. Some days I think I won't make it. Some days I don't want to. I know that my life has been changed forever, but what can I do to help ease the pain — and to help me "move on" with my life?


Why did I get a false positive HIV test?

Dear Alice,

I recently had a routine HIV screening done for prenatal labs. It was positive. Thank GOD, western blot came out to be negative. My OB is reassuring me not to worry, that false positives sometimes come out in pregnancy, and as long as the western blot is negative — I'm negative. Could you explain a little more in detail as to why and if you agree with my doctor? I'm at very little risk otherwise and had a negative HIV test about five years ago and am with the same person (my husband).