How can I learn how to recover from my eating disorder?

I have been bulimic for six years now. I have tried so many times to quit, but I always fail. When I eat I feel guilty about it sooo much that it is impossible not to purge. I feel so helpless. My boyfriend walked in on me the other day, and the look on his face broke my heart. I REALLY want to recover, but I need help. And I have no idea where to go. I will be a starting college this September, but I don't want to wait that long. I want help now.


Can you tell me more about the efficacy, safety, and legality of Cannabidiol (CBD) oil?

I recently heard about CBD oil - that it can be effective for chronic pain and anxiety, both of which I've struggled with (and seen many specialists about) for years. But when I went looking for more information, I couldn't find many resources that looked like they came from legitimate, trustworthy sources. Can you shed some light on the subject?


Why do I feel unrested when I dream?

I go through phases where, when I sleep, I don't have any dreams (that I remember, at least). I sleep well and I wake up rested. Every few months I go through a week or two when I have nights full of incredibly vivid dreams and I wake up remembering at least five or six of them. Because of all these vivid dreams, I wake up feeling far less rested than I do when I don’t dream at all. Is there a particular reason for this? Does dreaming more at night mean your sleep is less restful?


Are genes involved in schizophrenia?

My father has schizophrenia. My great grandmother was manic-depressive. What are the genetic risks of my child being schizophrenic if I have one? Are there any tests that can be done either before becoming pregnant or prenatally to determine probability? Has a gene been found linked to schizophrenia?


Am I a pedophile?

For my entire adult life (the past four years), I have been sexually attracted to young girls. I think about being with one often when I masturbate, and have intense sexual fantasies involving 8 to 14 year old females. I have yet to act on my feelings, NOR DO I WANT TO! I know it is wrong to have sex with a minor; I know that it violates them and totally scars them emotionally for life. I know that a child can NEVER consent to sex. But... I still have these fantasies. I'm afraid to tell a therapist about this, but I know that's what I should do. Would a therapist tell the cops or something? I haven't broken any laws... but still, what would a doctor say or do? I want more than anything else to be normal, and have healthy relationships with women, but I'm so afraid of them. I feel as though I'm a moth, and adult women are fire... they may look nice, but if I get too close to them, they'll burn me. But little girls... they just seem more real. I have never had an intimate relationship with anyone in my life. I have never been on a date, never kissed, never even held hands. But then again, I've never asked a woman out either. I'm just so afraid of women. I think that might be why I like little girls. I guess what I want to know is... should I tell a shrink, or will that only make things worse?


What causes spontaneous tripping?

I want to know what it is when you spontaneously trip without dropping tabs or anything. I've never had any drugs except marijuana. It is weird. I know that tripping is an induced psychosis, so am I psychotic or what? I was seeing a shrink and will be going back into treatment next semester. I think substance use is boring and a complete copout on life. I've made a lot of discoveries without needing to trip. Why does this happen? Tell me what you know.


Do I need to see someone about my soap eating obsession?

I'm going to cut right to the chase. I eat soap. It makes me feel good, especially when I'm stressed. Well, I don't sit there eating whole bars at a time, but I do take little chunks off to nibble sometimes. Only bar soap though, the all natural ones (I like the taste).

Am I going to have long term side effects from doing this? Please answer back, I don't see a lot of research on this, even though I've heard of quite a few other people that do this. Is it necessary for me to talk to a professional about this?

It seems kind of silly, I was just wondering.