Why do I lose my erection when I put on a condom?

I care for my girlfriend, whom I have been seeing for a few months now. I have no problem maintaining an erection when she performs oral sex on me. In fact I can climax twice in a relatively short time. We have, however, been unable to actually engage in intercourse, since when we go to put on the condom, I lose my erection. I'm not really having too much of a problem getting erect (i.e., I get an erection, and may lose it early on, but I am able to get and maintain another one for oral sex). What could be the problem? Stress? A lack of physical attraction? I will be grateful for any answer you can provide me.


Do I have legitimate reasons to go to therapy?

I don't have what would qualify for legitimate reason to go to the campus counseling center. Is this service typically only for medical related problems? I just want to be able to talk to someone about some of my problems right now. I feel like I "know" the answer to all my questions (regarding time management, developing healthy eating and sleeping habits, confusion, signs of depression, life management, etc., etc.). However, I thought it would be helpful to talk to a professional that would help me talk through some of things I'm thinking about. Who can I see?


Will I ever get over my grief?

Thanks very much for being here, for all us angst-ridden students of the world. My problem is that my father died two years ago from a heart attack that he suffered on his way to work. It was very difficult to comprehend his death. It seemed to be so unfair and arbitrary. I was angry. Very angry for a long period of time. I am over that now. I learned that anger is easier, more expedient to deal with than the nitty gritty of emotions.

While I was in England, the leader of the British opposition party died of a fatal heart attack. The news has devastated me. I keep thinking of the awful things that I went through when the same thing happened to me. Will I ever get over this?


Can I quit alcohol and cigarettes at the same time?

I have been a smoker for about 8 years and smoke about a pack per day. I am also an alcoholic and now drink about 7 to 10 beers a day, and have been for the past 2.5 years. Last night I decided to quit drinking beer every day and today I am already shaky, nervous, and can't concentrate. I want to quit smoking also so I can join the army. Is it dangerous to quit both at once? Would it be too much stress on my body and mind? And also, would having just one beer a day for the next couple days help with the withdrawal symptoms?


Am I a pathological liar?

I AM A LIAR... I lie to my friends, I lie to my family, I lie to people I don't even know, but most of all, I lie to myself. Sometimes I catch myself telling a story to someone and actually believing myself when I made the whole ordeal up. Do I have a problem? Am I a pathological liar? How can I reverse my lies and come clean without hurting the people I love?


How can I find a therapist?

I am trying to find a therapist. I have to go in-network for my health insurance to cover it, so I have this long list of therapists, but I don't know anything about them. Do you have any suggestions as to how to go about choosing one and/or questions to ask? Is there a "Go Ask Alice!" answer I could read for this info? I found my last therapist through the recommendation of a colleague at work and another through my school's counseling service. Now I need to spread my wings and find a professional therapist on my own! Yikes!

Thanks for any help you can give me!!!!!!!!!!!


Should I start PrEP?

If my husband takes antivirals or post-exposure prophylaxis can we still have sex with a condom and still complete the process like normal? It is affecting our sex life because he does not want to infect me. I don't want to be infected but I knew what I was getting into from the start. I might start PrEP as it is now available to me. What are your thoughts?


Is there a connection between Depo-Provera and hair loss?

I have taken three Depo-Provera shots. My hair started falling out excessively several months ago. In looking for answers I found out that this is a side effect to the shots. I was not informed of that before I took the shots. I saw in one of your Go Ask Alice! answers that depo-provera suppresses the Follicle Stimulating Hormone and the Luteinizing Hormone. What is this hormone? Is this what makes my hair fall out? And do you know if there is anything I can do to stop it? My next shot is due by May 15 but I am not going to get it. Thanks.