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What can I do if I'm experiencing an aversion to sex with my long-term partner?

I've been with my boyfriend for just over 4 years. Our sex life has always been the strong thread in our relationship, even when we've had trouble in other areas. We both feel we are the best sexual matches we've ever had. But over the past 8 months things have slowly degraded on my end. He is still as excited as ever, but I just don't feel like it. When we try, I actually feel physically protective, as if blocking my body from a stranger, especially my breasts. It's like a physical compulsion to protect, but neither of us have a history of abuse in our relationship or outside of it, and his approach is loving and open. When he's clothed and we're not about to have sex I love holding him, being held by him, standing next to him, touching him, etc. I'm not physically repulsed by his body: I recognize that he's a ridiculously attractive man! I had some advice that I shouldn't force myself to have sex if I don't want to, but I've also heard the opposite: that I should stop thinking and just push through my body's shutdown. Most of the times when I do force myself I end up enjoying it, but that doesn't take away this "repulsion" feeling at the start. The worst thing is that he feels rejected and dissatisfied and keeps asking what he can do to turn me on. What to do?

Topics:

Relationships Sexual and Reproductive Health

Why am I depressed as I navigate my sexuality?

Thank you for everything, and it is being appreciated by thousands. I have read all your advice to others and have learned a lot. However, I have a problem that I do not know how to handle. It started when I decided to turn myself around from being bisexual to straight (nobody knew what I was, except my best friend, who is also bisexual). I now have a big hole inside me that is being filled by the dark things of life (such as hatred). I had good qualities, such as a great personality, being open-minded, and I would rather go through life without it than turn back to the "bad" habits (please do not get me wrong, I will never judge gays for I have been close to being one). Please help me to fill the hole with life, to get back or improve on my qualities, and to gain the knowledge to approach and attract someone of the opposite sex. And one last thing, do you think it is wise to let my future girlfriend know what I used to be?

Topics:

Mental and Emotional Health Relationships

Is it possible to reopen a closed piercing?

I have two piercings in each earlobe; however I have not worn earrings in the second set of holes for several years. Recently I tried to insert earrings into the seldom-used pierce holes. One earring went in with no problem, but the second did not go through after several attempts (I actually gave up because my last attempt bent the earring post). I have tried inserting other earrings but they also will not go all the way through. Is this something I can fix myself? Do I have to get the same hole professionally re-pierced? Will there be problems with scar tissue at the site?

Topics:

General Health

Why are my wounds healing more slowly?

I have noticed lately that wounds such as cuts are healing much more slowly than before. I have also noticed that I am scarring more. For example, a tiny hole in my hand has developed a scar that is four times the size of the actual injury, and it is slightly raised. Am I missing something in my diet that is causing this? Or could it be an effect from on-going stress and anxiety? I am a vegetarian with some vegan tendencies, and I take a multi-vitamin every day or so.

Topics:

General Health

How can I find support as a gay student in New York?

I'm an undergraduate student from China. And I'm going to the mathematics department with fellowship. I'm really very happy and eager for my future life in Columbia.

I'm now twenty years, but still have no girlfriends. Why? Because I'm a gay student. Sometimes I really feel very sad about that. You see, I'm also an emotional person and I'm eager for love, but I can't. I'd not prefer to make gay friends on Web sites since many of them are lying and I'm afraid to get AIDS. Since I'm very pure, good looking, and excellent in study, some classmates and schoolmates (male) show great affection to me. But I dare not accept it because I'm AFRAID.

Both my parents are professors, but they are very traditional and could not accept that. At the same time, I do not want to hurt them, so I really don't know what to do. I know New York City have a lot of gay students, and it's also such a "free" metropolitan city, so I'm really very glad, but still mixed feeling.

Here I wanna ask you:

(1) Are there a lot of gay students in Columbia University?

(2) Is there any gay club or activity in CU?

(3) What should I do now?

Thanks so much! I've seen your answer to a lot of questions and feel very excellent. Best wishes!

Topics:

Relationships

Is the bump on the side of my anus hemorrhoids or something else?

1) This is sort of an embarrassing question...Recently I found out that there is something unusual just outside of my anus. It has grown like a pea. When I touch it, it is sort of hard but smooth, and it hurts a bit. What should I do? Is this like some kind of cancer?

2) I have this problem and I am too embarrassed to ask a doctor about it. I am a nineteen-year-old male and have this growth in my anus. It popped up about one week ago. It is about the size of a pea. Could it be hemorrhoids? If not, what can it be? Should I be worried, and what should I do about it?

Topics:

General Health Sexual and Reproductive Health

Is it dangerous to hold in number two?

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three years, and we've lived together for more than one, but I still can't do Number Two when he's in the house. It's not a problem during the week when we both go to our separate jobs, but on the weekends, it's usually just the two of us in the house all day (and night) Saturday and Sunday and if I feel the need to poo, I have to wait until Monday. My question is this — are there any adverse health issues I should be concerned about with waiting to poo? I know that holding your pee can give you bladder infections, but is there a similar issue with Number Two?

Topics:

General Health Relationships
Showing 31 - 40 of 141 results

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