Is there a connection between emotions and physical pain?

When I hear someone make a negative comment about me it sometimes sticks and for some reason my chest will begin to hurt. A friend of mine said it was emotional shock. For a while the feeling went away, but then it got worse. Now the pain will range from my heart to my left arm, depending on how badly (depressed) I feel. In general, I want to know if I should be concerned or if it's just as my friend says: "emotional shock," that's just gotten worse.


What can I do if my parents don't believe I'm bi?

I came out recently to my parents as being bisexual. They were surprised, as expected, but they didn't believe me! They said it's "not normal for someone to suddenly change their orientation." But it wasn't sudden — I've known for a while! What should I tell them?


How should I tell my partner about my herpes?

When my boyfriend and I began our sexual relationship, he insisted on using condoms. I gratefully agreed because I felt it then wouldn't be necessary for me to tell him about my STD — herpes. Now, two months later he's decided that he "trusts" me enough to stop using the condoms. I don't see any way I can keep the relationship, even if he can handle the STD part, if I tell him I've been lying over the past two months. Do you have any advice? I don't want to lose him, but I don't want to be responsible for giving him any diseases either.


Am I ready to start dating a new guy?

I have recently started seeing this man who I think is adorable and things are going really well. My last relationship was a three year nightmare that ended a long time before I finally broke it off. Everyone keeps saying to follow the rules and take it slow and to be careful because I am on the rebound and it is too soon to get involved. How can I know if what I am feeling is right and if I should just go with the flow? I am still feeling so new at all this stuff and I am often very scared to get hurt again. Please give me some of your expert advice!


What should I do if I'm successful but not happy?

I'm not in college anymore, but students could benefit from this question, too. I'm single with a 'great' job (pays well, insurance, pension, etc.), a decent place to live, no debt... in short, life could be much worse. But the only thing lately that makes me happy is doing kind things anonymously for people. I'm rather wealthy but don't want a big TV or a fancy car. I'd rather spend a vacation at a local monastery meditating and performing service. I'd be committing economic suicide to quit my job, and so many are worse off, but 'success through hard work' doesn't make me happy. I'm sure a number of students must have these feelings already. What are your feelings about this, Alice?


How can I get over my boyfriend using porn magazines?

So my problem is that recently (about 6 months ago) I discovered that my boyfriend keeps pornographic magazines. We have been going out for 6 years. Much of that has been long-distance, but we have lived together for the last year. This discovery blew me away in part because until then my only complaint about our relationship was the fact that he didn't want sex nearly as often as I did — so now I'm angry that while I was feeling less than satisfied, physically, he was masturbating, and leaving me out in the cold. Since then, I've also noticed that he only wants to have sex after he's spent some time with his mags.

Given that I am horrified by the mere existence of this kind of material — I'm not going to get into a debate about its legality, but I truly believe it is exploitation worse than slavery. Given this, is there any way to work things out with him? In short, how far am I supposed to stretch my ethics, just because part of me believes that sexually, each of us is free to do what we want??


What should I do if my girlfriend's afraid to have sex?

My girlfriend and I have been going out for more than two years now. I am a first-year student (18 years old) and she is 17. We haven't had sex yet, but during the last year and a half we tried pretty much everything there is besides it. I really feel this is the right time, but when I try to talk to her about it, all she says is that she is afraid. She says it is not that she does not believe in losing virginity before marriage, she is just afraid. I don't want to pressure her, but I just feel that maybe I am not the right person for her or something. What should I do? Thanks.


Why am I lacking sensation during sex with a partner?

I could not find anything on this on the web. Maybe you can help me. I have a woman in my life who I am considering marrying. The only thing really holding me back is the sex with her. The thing is that there is almost no sensation. Sex with her feels like I'm wearing a condom even though I am not. I am thinking that either she is "large" or "stretched out", or I am too small. Perhaps it's a combination of both. I've been with women who were so snug and tight that I was able to climax within seconds. With this woman, it is very difficult and takes more than 10 minutes. We've tried baby oil, "motion lotion", and KY heating gel.

Nothing works, and I'm fixing to find another woman just to satisfy me, which I don't really want to do. But I know that if I stay with her and nothing changes, I will cheat eventually anyway.

She has never had any children and hasn't really had all that many partners. I'm just thinking that she and I are not a good match in that department.

Can you please advise? Is there anything that she and/or I can do to make for a better "fit" and thus-a better sex life-and ultimately, lifelong monogamy?


Does my friend think she was raped?

You have an excellent service and give great advice. That is why I feel comfortable asking you this question. About three weeks ago, a group of my friends and I went out to a movie and then a club where we each had some alcohol. After the club, we went back to a friend's room where the group gradually dispersed until there was only myself, two male friends, and one female friend. We began to play sex games. Eventually, we all were naked, on my friend's bed. The female of the group was the center of our activity. She seemed to want it and even encouraged what the three of us started doing to her.

Although we all were tipsy, it was a great sexual experience for all of us, or so I thought. My two male friends have no problem with what happened. The only thing is that my female friend won't speak to us or return any of our calls. I saw her walking down the street the other day and tried to talk to her, but she wouldn't even raise her head to look me in the eye. Do you have any idea what is wrong? Could my friend feel that she was raped? I want to apologize, but I'm not sure what to do.